all i can be is alyssa marie

Okay, so I can't sleep, I am feeling my eyelids get a tiny bit heavier by the hour though... not to mention my back is in some serious pain from sitting here for a while. I just dumped out all the Christmas leftovers, because if I didn't I am sure Nick would eat them even with mold all over them... I don't know why, but he doesn't care about that stuff, lol yuck! Let's just say our fridge looks really sad now, and is in need of some love. Donations, anyone? Haha, just kidding.

My doctors from UC Davis called me today, and let me know that they found out whats growing in my lungs, and how we are going to treat it, etc etc. Basically I am going to do another round of IV antibiotics for 3 months (eek), and then two orals. Hopefully we get rid of this fucking thing. I'm pretty sick of being sick.

Not including today (new years eve), Nick leaves in 18 days. I can't really believe it... I am going to miss him so much. I know I am being a wah baby and I post about it too much, but I just hope he knows how much I really really love him. I am sad that it will be lonely where he goes, and he will barely get to talk with me. Hopefully it will go by fast... I can't wait to give him a big hug and kiss when he comes back. God I love him. I'm getting all emotional now, damnit.

Well tonight I guess we are going to go to Nick's dad's house... So that should be fun, they are all pretty nice. I bought a new dress to wear for new years a couple weeks back, and now I don't even think that I am going to wear it, because I will be overly dressed, and that's just embarassing. I am going to be doing my makeup nice though, if that counts for anything. :)

Okay, well I think I am going to go to bed or something, I am so bored I don't even know what to do. Later loves.

xx